NANACARTER LAA.

heyhelloe peoples. today's posts will be about my previous loves ahh okayy. random muchh. anyways!
you guys, im sure yall had crushes before right? yeahh well this guy i knew.. for quite some time, actually left me for no reason ahh. idk why. his name is... nevermind. you guys need not know who he is okaay but he's a real sweet guy who caught my heart. he always advice me of what and what not to do. hmmmm. i still remember our first day we knew each other was 1 day before last year's zouk out @ siloso beach. i read his blog a few days back then and then i tagged him saying i want to "kenalkenal" with him, well i said it indirectly that is. I left my email at his tagboard and POOF! he added. so we chatted. and i found out that he has a twin brother! hahah. i knew his twin brother first before i knew him and i didnt even realised that they were twins. hahhaha. our chemistry got stronger and stronger and we finally mettttt! i was so happy yknow. and he surprised me. hahah. i told him what i was going to wear on that dayy, when i ask him he didnt want to tell me. so the next day when we met i saw him wear the same coloured shirt, pants and shoe. haahahahaha. wtf~ i was shocked lah. i was wearing a white top, he was also. i was wearing black skirt, he was wearing black PANTS obviously. and i was wearing black shoeeeee and he was wearing black shoe. ahhahahaha. kkkkkzz. he was the first everrrr guy to go out with me like that. hahaha. so we met under my block. he said he wanted to shock me ah play chakchak with me. TAPI TAK MENJADY eh. hehehehs. and so we walked our way to lakeside mrt to meet my other 2 friends Fafa and Yan. they were shy, lol. hahahahahahahaaaa. (lets hope i dont cryy while drawing near the end of the story) so we headed to Vivo City BY BUS! Ohyeah Fafa also brought along her lil brother. So 3 people sat at the back of the bus and HIM and i sat the the 2 seats that seat. we talked. and.. jengjengjeng. Okay well this is so TAK TAU MALU but well on that day he clearly knows that i really have feelings for him and i sorta held his hands lah. (tears coming out) so i held his hands.. and when we reach Fafa and Yan and her lil brother played with the water while him and i sat at the shade while talking. (my heart's painful) we snapped a few pictures. cool pictures yaw. sadly i reformatted my computer and lost all the pictures. (CRIES) then after an hour or what they went home and he told me he wanted to get his mom a perfume. okay so we went into the mall and searched for perfume. we saw a sale and i recomended davidoff perfume. he bought that perfume! hehehe. (omg im listening to superhuman.. superhuman is HIS SONG) and then when he wanted to go to the counter i still remember that part when he looked behind and held his hand out wanting me to come infront with him. AWWWWWWW! i doubt he recalls all the things that happened lah kan. hmm. and well i went infront then i saw his elmo wallet.. hehehe. so cute much. my tummy was grumbling then but i tahan. i didnt ask for anything. so i said, wanna head home? then he said sure. so we boarded bus 30 once again. he's going to jurong to send me back, then board another bus to go back to bukit panjang to go home yknow. its so sweet. but when we reached jurong i kinda cried because i wanted him to know that i rly2 love him but i didnt want to rush things. he hugged me and we kissed. my heart's really in pain.. when after a few days i guess we had a quarrel? i dont know. we sorta lost contact. i called you, you didnt pick up. i msged you, you replied with uninterested replies. you promised me. you promised that no matter what we'll stay in contact. but what's all this? youre not sticking to your promise. why? haish. you're all that i longed for.. Readers, you wanna know something? No matter how many guys i contact or what, the only person i think of at night is him. but i doubt he'll even care that i type all this, memories about us. what went wrong? i've no idea.. you know that i miss you. haish. youre busy with school. work. hmmmmmmm. ): a song that always reminds me of you is Superhuman by Chris Brown. Remember you said you wanted to be my superhuman? That last time i chatted with you in msn was... only god knows. such a long time.
"dont know what youre doing to me with your love." - that was the line that you said to me once. i guess once or twice. hmmmm.. you said it was so hard for you to say I LOVE YOU to somebody. and you said it to me. are you saying that all that are fake? if you really love me you wont lost contact with me. you changed my whole life. you almost turned me to a new deana, a better deana. when you left; i became worst. wont you ever come back to me? remember cookie monster and elmo? theyre bestfriends right? and bestfriends stick together through thick and thin! please.. i really fcking need you.. ]:

now that all you readers know the deep scar left in me, any suggestions on what to do? all i know is cry my heart out.. i cant forget this chap.
xoxo. deana. xoxo. cookiemonster.

ps. I REALLY HOPE YOU READ THIS AND TAG ME PLEASE..